Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
Randomize
