Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
Randomize
