I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
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