You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Randomize
