Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
Randomize