he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize
