i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
Randomize