Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
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