love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
Randomize
