Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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