Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
Why are there so many empty soda cans in my room?
You put them in a circle around your bed and said it was the best way to ward of the witches from hocus pocus....then you remembered you needed salt too. I'm assuming you havent gone to the bathroom yet.
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Your cat ate my taco.
. . . I don't have a cat?
It was laying in your bed. Now it's hunting for more tacos.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
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