i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
Randomize
