she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
Randomize
