Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
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