If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
Randomize
