i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
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