Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
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