new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
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