why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
