I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
The dick lei will go down in squad history
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
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