I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Randomize
