He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
Randomize
