these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
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