hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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