Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
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