Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
Randomize
