Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
