Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize
