it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
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