Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Randomize
