hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
Randomize
