I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Randomize
