You can't special order awesome
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
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