I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
i will never coherently bang her
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
