i was rollin on her like bob the builder
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
Randomize
