Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
Everything about him screamed your future.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Randomize
