If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Randomize
