there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
Randomize