Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
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