Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
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