you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
