mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
Randomize
