You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Randomize
