Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Randomize