2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
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