if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize
