Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Randomize
