You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
I just pynch a tree in the face
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
Woke up with a retainer in my boxers and about ten chicks passed out around me. now I feel like something out of Cinderella, trying to find whose teeth fit in the glass retainer.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
Randomize
