Already got asked if we're dating
piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
Randomize
