I wannas sexs uuuuu
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Randomize
